This Foe has a Name {poem}

Note: This was written in late 2018 though as I was birthing the Seek the Light Dyed4you Art piece. I didn’t feel led to share it for nearly a year. I’ve had ongoing struggles with depression (and lost a cousin to it as well). Unfortunately, this foe is more prevalent than one might think. Too often in christian circles we give pat advice like, “You just need to read your bible more” or implying if they would just “praise more” or “be more grateful” they would be ok.

As a result, many who struggle hide what they’re going through by withdrawing or wearing a mask. Depression isn’t simply feeling sad. We can know through it all God is faithful and present, but that doesn’t stop the onslaught. I encourage you to find ways to be supportive if you have someone in your world who shares this struggle. Ask them how you can best support them, and resist the urge to think you know how to “pull them out of it.” And most of all, cover them in prayer because God is faithful. 

With all that said, this is a poem of sorts that I wrote while I was in the midst of one of my moments. I shared my struggles during a Lunchtime Live on Dyed4you Ministries’s Facebook Page, and was overwhelmed by how many others shared this foe. Their response is what prompted the creation of Seek the Light (which this poem is now a part of).

This Foe has a Name

Darkness
So overwhelming it seems light will never shine again

Despair
The screams inside my head, the torture endless

No weak and fruitless substitute
Can fill this void inside
No food, no drug, no counterfeit
The need won’t be denied

It aches and hungers day by day
And never seems to wane
The pain so stark – it terrifies
The hope, it dwindles – dreams begin to die

It feels as though it will never end
And yet oh Lord and yet

This foe has a name
But no depression can win
Against the One who on a word
Brought light from nothing
Void
Emptiness

I hide in a corner, or just wear a mask
Just to engage is an overwhelming task
Stop asking me questions, it all feels so much
I’m drowning in blackness, I can’t feel Your touch

Even when the dark seems deadly
And it feels no light is found
Let Your love woo me, Lord
Let Your loving arms surround

And even when the darkness closes in
And it seeps into my bones
Your light still shines, Your presence is here
And if Your face I see
I trust You, Lord
I cling to You
You are my victory

So even when the blackness
Seems overwhelmingly bleak
Still my eyes look for You,
Your heart I always seek

Though tears may fall and hearts may ache
I look to You – You won’t forsake
So through the hurt and through the pain
I cling to You again and again